Fastball to the dick, Redskins pimping cheerleaders, Dr. Oz, jail guard identified by huge, hook shaped penis, woman gets cockroach stuck in ear, the DJ Khaled controversy and Johnny Depp is a mess.

Bobby Cremins’ wig, Ed Begley Jr., post sex routines, Dan Bilzerian, nocturnal emissions, Bruins player is a licker, golf course calls police on slow playing group, Shaq majored in bro science, septuagenarian gets church congregation high, masturbating at work, Johnny Depp sued again, Blac Chyna pregnant, Charlie Rose’s new TV show and Kanye’s breakdown.

Shopping for a new dick, small town sports reporter assault, Derek Jeter doesn’t want to answer questions, high school baseball game ends 82 – 0, overwhelmed mailman hordes years worth of mail, “cocaine babe,” #lyfecoaching, Utah’s draconian liquor laws, RIP Avicii, Rachel Weisz, free Meek Mill and the Hollywood sex cult.

Andre the Giant, A Quiet Place, Elvis, iTunes reviews, Little League dad, alien fucking, snake fucking, Fancee’s PJs, Pete Mitchell vs. Barbarino, Cosby trial, and hard times for Glenn Beck.

Did John Kruk jerk it in the clubhouse, squirrel CPR, “shut your fuck up,” the panty stealing jurist, towns with sex names get free PornHub Premium, serial toilet clogger, Tim McGraw, Mario Lopez, TJ Miller is a mess, Charlie Rose loves to fuck and Brad Pitt might be dating an MIT professor.

James Corden, RichRod, shit mountain, RIP Charles Winchester III, Robert Kraft pulls the goalie, Texas doesn’t respect freedom, Chinese condoms too small for Zimbabwe, Canada’s most notorious gangster, Armie Hammer’s ballsack, the Shape of Water sucks, Macaulay Culkin twitter meltdown, Tiffany Haddish and Brad Pitt and the Bracket Challenge announcement.